


Sunsets and Cigarettes

by jxices



Category: My Chemical Romance
Genre: Car Accidents, Eventual Smut, Expanding this into something very long, Frank realizes he has feelings for Gerard, Gerard and Frank do stuff while Gerard is drunk and he never remembers, Gerard needs to get sober, Hospitals, I took many artistic liberties, Inspired by The Perks of Being a Wallflower, M/M, Mentions of Cancer, Mentions of Death, Overdose, Parties, Pining, Ray and Frank are good buds, Some angst, Song: Tonight Tonight (The Smashing Pumpkins), bit of a slowburn, cANceR StiCKs, drug usage, everyone is depressed, forming of the band, hopefully, occasional music references, we'll see lol
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-07
Updated: 2020-07-07
Packaged: 2021-03-05 00:41:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,017
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25135570
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jxices/pseuds/jxices
Summary: Frank and Gerard are best friends who have been through a lot together.Gerard battles with substance abuse issues during the forming of the band, and Frank struggles with new found feelings for Gerard.
Relationships: Frank Iero & Gerard Way, Frank Iero/Gerard Way
Comments: 2
Kudos: 9





	Sunsets and Cigarettes

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! Here's the first chapter to what will hopefully be expanded into something much longer. It's somewhat inspired by The Perks of Being a Wallflower. Just a widdle bit. 
> 
> protip: whenever there's a song playing in the fic, you should listen along with it.   
> the first song is tonight, tonight by the smashing pumpkins. just a suggestion (:

Frank had been wasting away on the couch for hours-- just switching the channels on the TV… but nothing was on. The frustration of boredom was really starting to get to him. This was no way to spend a Friday night, especially in the Summer. Guess he really is a loser, huh? A symphony of crickets played outside Frank’s hopper window, through which rays of late sunlight shone onto his floor. Frank began to drift slowly into sleep, the low murmur of the television becoming a lullaby. That’s when Frank heard the table next to him buzz. He shot up to check his phone.

**hey, u busy? or... awake? -g**

A text! At last! And from Gerard… even better. The majority of texts Frank gets now are spam-- occasionally from family members. But none of that shit ever matters. Frank wondered what his friend was texting him for.

**yah, i’m awake, what’s up? (and you don’t have to sign ur messages, i can see ur name.)**

**i know. <3 -g**   
**so u aren’t busy. be at ur house in 5, meet me on the road. -g**

Frank rolled his eyes. Frank never actually said he wasn’t busy. But maybe Gerard knows him too well-- of course Frank wouldn’t be busy. So Frank got his backpack from the carpeted floor and threw in a phone charger and a pack of cigarettes. He checked his phone again before he left the basement.

**p.s. bring booze! and snacks plzzzzz -g**

Gerard is lucky Frank likes him. Frank quickly ran up the stairs to the kitchen and opened the fridge. He pulled 4 beers out of the bottom shelf and slammed the door shut, glad he lived alone and wasn’t waking anyone up. He threw a pack of baby carrots that had been sitting on the counter into his backpack as he walked out the door. Upon looking up, he saw Gerards truck pulled up to the curb. Gerard was gazing intently at Frank and cracked a smile when Frank popped his chin up at him. “Finally,” Gerard exasperated as Frank opened the door and threw himself into the passenger seat. “Shut up, you couldn’t have been sitting here for more than three minutes.” Frank replied teasingly. Gerard turned on the engine and tossed Frank’s backpack into the backseat.

  
“So where are we going?” Frank asked offhandedly, buckling himself into the car seat. Gerard turned towards him slightly and smiled toothily. “Wherever the night takes us, Frankie,” he replied, almost curtly. Frank scoffed at Gerard’s larger-than-life persona that he had come all too accustomed to. Gerard certainly had a worldliness to him.  
Gerard was all about living every day to the fullest. Frank was sure that was an ideal he picked up in therapy. He was just glad that Gerard was getting better. He was getting better with every day-- getting out of the house, trying his best to spend time with friends… but Frank was virtually the only friend Gerard had. He was okay with that-- if anyone was going to be your only friend, getting stuck with Frank wouldn’t be that bad.

  
Gerard jarringly stepped on the gas and pulled out from the curb. It wasn’t long before they were speeding down the street. “Put something on,” Gerard suggested, waving his hand in the general direction of the radio. Frank complied and twisted around to reach into his backpack. He pulled out his phone charger, plugging one end into his phone and the other into the car. Frank quickly opened his phone and hit the shuffle button on one of the playlists he and Gerard had made together.  
The opening to a familiar song played. Frank reached out to skip it, but Gerard quickly slapped his hand away. “No!” He exclaimed with a giggle. He extended his arm and turned the volume knob on the radio up. Frank threw his hands into the air with a reluctant “okay”.

_Time is never time at all,_   
_You can never ever leave_   
_Without leaving a piece of youth--_

Gerard wiggled around and rested his head against his car seat, as if to enjoy the song as much as he could. Frank followed his lead and turned towards the window, placing his chin lazily upon the palm of his hand. He watched as the little run-down houses of his neighbourhood dashed out of view.

_We’re not the same,_   
_We’re different_   
_Tonight, tonight…_   
_Tonight, so bright…_

Frank turned his head towards Gerard using his index finger. Gerard sluggishly reciprocated the action, grinning tightly when their eyes met. Frank kept gazing at Gerard after he had looked back at the road. He watched as Gerard raked his slender fingers through his jet-black (and slightly greasy) hair, it falling back down to his shoulders when his hand met the steering wheel again. The light of the sunset painted Gerards eyes into what seemed like a classic oil painting. A corner of Frank’s mouth curled up as he pivoted back to the window.

_If you held yourself up to the light..._   
_And the embers never fade_   
_In your city by the lake_   
_The place where you were born--_

The sun dropped lower with each minute. Frank sure was glad Gerard pulled him out of his house. The city flickered in the night. Frank extended a hand out of the window and closed his eyes with the Summer wind cascading through his fingertips.

_Believe, believe_   
_Believe in me_   
_Believe, believe_   
_In the resolute urgency of now…_

Frank opened his eyes to see Gerard turning onto a mountain road. The two sped up the incline as the city became smaller in the distance.

_We’ll find a way to offer up the night tonight_   
_The indescribable moments of your life, tonight_   
_The impossible is possible, tonight_   
_Believe in me as I believe in you, tonight…_

With a few drum beats, the song ended, and Gerard slowed into a dirt pull-off on the side of the rocky road. “This where you wanna get out?” Frank asked. “Well, if that’s alright with YOU-- then yeah,” Gerard replied, taking his keys out of the ignition and opening his door. Frank nodded and pulled his backpack out of the cramped backseat. With a hop, he got out of the truck and followed Gerard.

  
Gerard sat down on a flat rock near the edge of the dirt platform they were on. Frank took a seat on a rock across from him. He looked at Gerard expectantly, waiting for him to say or do something-- but Gerard only peered out at the city before them, exhaling shallowly. Frank blinked and shifted his gaze to his feet. He thought about how he needed to get new shoes. “I had a feeling the sunset was going to be perfect tonight,” Gerard stated. Frank looked back up at him.

  
“Yeah?” Frank quizzed.

  
“Yeah.”

  
“Well you were right.”

  
“I know. Hey, did you bring what I asked you to?”

  
“Oh. Yeah,” Frank replied, unzipping his backpack and handing one of the beers to Gerard. “Nice,” Gerard said. “Thank you.” Frank nodded and pulled out a beer for himself. They both cracked open their respective cans and got quiet.

  
Frank examined the view. Past the edge of the mountain, there was a wave of rocky terrain. Sparse shrubs and thickets were growing on the side of the mountain. If you looked further down, you would see the natural environment dissolve into the cityscape of their neighbourhood. Little buildings owned by local businesses, corner stores and diners, scattered streetlights and newsstands. Farther in the distance Frank could swear he saw his house.

  
Then there was the sunset that Gerard so proudly predicted. It really was beautiful. Crimson red bled into a light tangerine right over the horizon. In the middle of the sky, the dark indigo of the night clashed against the sun in blinding shades of magenta. Puffy clouds populated the air in the distance. Frank heard the chirps of peewees behind him.  
“What about the snacks?” Gerard asked, breaking the silence. “Er--” Frank poked, pulling the baby carrots out of his backpack. He pursed his lips as he offered them over to Gerard. “You’re fucking kidding me,” Gerard said bittersweetly. Frank chuckled and said, “I’m sorry, I felt rushed!” Gerard clasped the bag of carrots in his hand. “What?” He probed. “You rushed me!” Frank replied with a titter. Gerard shook his head and examined the bag. His nose scrunched up. “They’re warm!” He exclaimed. Frank scratched the back of his head, muttering another apology. “Geez… well I didn’t expect you to bring warm vegetables, so we’ll have to go somewhere. I’m hungry.” Gerard stated, getting up from his rock.

  
Frank watched as Gerard brought his beer can up to his lips and tilted his head back, finishing it. He crushed the can and shoved it into his jacket pocket along with the bag of carrots. Then he looked down at Frank impatiently. “Well, are you coming?” Gerard asked. “Yeah, yeah,” Frank uttered. He pushed himself up and guzzled down the beer as quickly as he could. Gerard sauntered over to the truck and Frank followed him. The two buckled themselves into the truck and Gerard began down the dirt road.

\---

Gerard made his way back into the city and pulled into the parking lot of a local diner called “The Griddle.” Before they got out of the truck, Frank retrieved the cigarettes from his backpack. The two of them walked up to the front door and walked in. “I’ll be with you two in just a moment,” The woman behind the counter said cheerfully. She walked out of view and came back with two menus and a smile. “Right this way,” she stated, leading Frank and Gerard to the booth in the very back of the diner. They sat themselves across from each other.

  
“Here are your menus,” the woman said, sliding two laminated sheets of paper onto the table. “We’ll have someone come and take your order.” She finished, walking back to the front counter after Gerard said thank you.

  
“So what do you want?” Gerard asked Frank. “I’ll probably just get a glass of water, I don’t want to spend your money--” Frank attempted to reply, getting shushed by his friend. “Shut up, you’ll eat,” he said. “Pancakes sound good?” Gerard probed, and Frank nodded his head gratefully.

  
A waiter approached the table and Gerard gave him their order. “Is that all?” the waiter inquired. “Yes sir,” Gerard replied, and then the waiter took their menus and dashed off. “Thank you Gee, you really didn’t have to,” Frank said softly. Gerard quickly began shaking his head and waving his hand in the air. “No, don’t worry about it. It’s the least I could do, huh?” he said. “I know money’s kind of tight right now, what with your mom and all,” Frank nodded shortly and gazed out the window into the parking lot. By this time, all sun had faded and the only traces of light left were from the moon and the stars. The sidewalk outside the window was lit up by the warm glow of the restaurant.

  
Frank thought about his mom. She recently died in the hospital. The whole thing was just too much for him to wrap his head around. He remembered the doctors saying that they did everything they could to fight the cancer but it was too late. He supposed maybe that was what two packs a day for twenty years did to you.

  
Frank shifted his gaze back to Gerard, who was playing with his hair and looking at the people in the booths on the far wall of the diner. Frank's sudden motion must have alerted Gerard though, because he turned his head to look back at Frank. When Frank looked at Gerard he felt better. Always. He had always been there for him. Through this whole thing with his mom, through getting bullied in school, and all the rest of the ugly stuff that made up Frank’s life.

  
Gerard grinned subtly at him, and Frank looked into Gerard’s eyes. _He really is a beautiful person_ , Frank thought. He stays kind when everything is wrong. Frank looked down to where his hands were sitting on the table, and he saw a pair of feet get closer to him and Gerard’s booth.

  
“Two pancake combos,” the waiter began. “... And two coffees.” He said, setting their food in front of them. “Thanks,” Frank uttered habitually. He picked up his fork, making a clicking sound against the table.

\---

When both Gerard and Frank had finished eating, the waiter came back with their check. “Thank you again Gee,” Frank said, drinking the final bit of coffee that was left in his cup. “It’s not a problem Frankie,” Gerard responded. He adjusted himself, getting prepared to leave. “Wanna smoke?” Frank inquired, and Gerard nodded.

  
The two made their way out the front door and sauntered off to a dark part of the parking lot. There was a large dumpster pressed up against a cinder block wall. Bits and pieces of garbage were strewn about the ground. Frank pressed his back up against the wall, keeping some distance between them and the smell of waste.

  
He pulled the box of cigarettes out of his jacket pocket and retrieved one for himself and one for Gerard. Gerard took the cigarette from Frank’s hand and waited patiently for some kind of fire. Frank fumbled for his lighter, holding his cigarette tightly between his lips. When he finally got a hold on it, he lifted his empty hand to shield the flame from the breeze and flicked his thumb to ignite the lighter.

  
He pivoted to face Gerard once his cigarette was lit. “Alright, c’mere,” He said, gesturing for Gerard to come closer. Gerard lifted his cigarette up to his lips and Frank raised the ignited lighter up to the end of the cylinder, careful not to burn him. It quickly caught light and Frank backed away from his friend.

  
“Thanks, Frankie,” Gerard said cheerily, blowing out smoke. “Well I owe you one, huh?” Frank responded, shoving his lighter into the back pocket of his jeans. They both remained quiet, taking drags off of their respective cigs every once in a while. “Hey, Gee?” Frank probed, breaking the silence. “Yeah, Frank?” Gerard replied.

  
“I really needed to get out of the house today… I felt myself, like, dying. It was really depressing. So… thanks for texting me. I appreciate it.” Frank said, looking off into no particular direction. In his peripheral vision he saw Gerard look at him. When Frank looked back, Gerard was wearing a goofy smile. “Well thanks for actually coming, dude. I’ve been dying too.” He said. Frank continued to look at him, grinning faintly. It was quiet, only the buzz of electricity could be heard. Frank thought once more about how much of a beautiful person Gerard is. His gaze slowly wandered down to Gerard’s lips, his body slowly leaning closer to Gerard, who only remained smiling, not noticing Frank’s subtle motion. Suddenly, Gerard’s attention darted away, and he pulled his phone out of his back pocket. Frank stumbled back slightly from the quick action.

  
“Ah-- my brother is wondering where I am,” Gerard said, apparently reading a text message. Frank was still adapting from the change of attitude. He was kind of disappointed without really knowing why. “Mikey?” Frank asked. He knew vaguely of _A brother_ , but had never really met one. “Yeah…” Gerard said, seeming to drift away. Then he suddenly had a realization. “Hey! We’re having a party tomorrow, do you want to come?” Gerard asked, hoping for a positive response. Frank quickly glossed over the contents of his mind to check if he was doing anything tomorrow. The answer was a resounding no. “Yeah, for sure! What time is it?” he questioned. Gerard waggled his head side to side. “Oh, I dunno… how about I pick you up at 9:30-ish?” he suggested. Frank’s eyebrows drew together. “Are you sure that wouldn’t be too much trouble?” he asked, firmly avoidant of being any kind of bother. “Positive.” Gerard affirmed. Frank smiled hesitantly. “Okay then. Sounds good.” He said, and they made their way to the truck.

\---

When they had finally reached Frank’s house, the two sluggishly unbuckled their seat belts and got out of the car. They sauntered to the front door, not wanting the night to come to an end. When they inevitably reached the end of their walk, Frank spun to face Gerard, who looked back. “Well you should go in and get some sleep. Rest for the big bash tomorrow.” Gerard said, smirking. He flicked his eyes up and down Frank, examining him for a reply. Frank tilted his head sadly, not wanting Gerard to leave. “Do you… wanna stay the night?” he poked, praying Gerard would say yes. Gerard gave a look of dismay. “I do, but I can’t-- Mikey’s wigged out. I’m sorry Frankie.” he said delicately, not wanting to hurt Frank. “Aw, all right. I’ll see you tomorrow Gee,” he responded. Gerard latched himself on to Frank, catching him slightly off guard. Once Frank processed what was going on, he hugged back, wrapping his arms around the middle of Gerard’s torso. Frank sighed, taking in the smell of cigarette smoke that encapsulated Gerard. He lightly caressed Gerard’s back. “See you tomorrow,” Gerard said sentimentally, letting go of his short friend. He smiled once more and then turned to walk back to his truck. Frank watched up until Gerard turned on the ignition and sped off, waving at Frank.

  
Frank let go of the air in his lungs and opened his front door. He thought about getting a beer. _Well I have some in my backpack_ , he thought. “Shit!” Frank whispered firmly, remembering the bag in the backseat of Gerard’s pickup truck. He shook his head and made his way downstairs, navigating his dark home. It’s good I’ll see him again tomorrow, Frank thought, finally throwing himself on his couch and shutting his eyes.

**Author's Note:**

> so there was that! I'll hopefully update soon (:   
> please leave comments! 
> 
> ps: it was such a struggle to not type "cancer sticks" during that smoking bit


End file.
